It appears that I’m so fucking desperate for love that my mistakes continuously catch up to me because I accept any kind of love. I mean historically I have chosen the bad guy after the bad guy after the bad guy. And that is because I have abandonment issues. And my abandonment issues stem from…
The blood stains on my pillow case
The blood stain on my pillow case remains. October 2, 2019 was when it all began. And I didn't realize the severity of it until I saw the blood stain on my pillow case. It all became real when I saw the scar on the back of my head for the first time and the…
The sexy skin I am in…
Photo by: Alisha Light; Instagram: @alightp This sexy skin I am in. It's the skin that I feel has been taken away from me. It has been abused. It has been taken for granted. Even in the photo above, I was in excruciating pain. I can remember the times I would go and "be sexy".…
In sickness and in health
I know we weren't married. But that's what we were working for. And if you couldn't handle in sickness and in health as a boyfriend. How could you handle it as a husband? I was in sickness when we met. Although, at the time we didn't know what it was. It was a bunch of…
I’m so sorry..
I am so sorry.. I hurt you I ignored the red flags I ignored the signs I didn't listen I allowed others to get in my head I allowed the thoughts and views of others including him to tell you on a continuous basis that I was living in my past and that my abuse…
I am feeling sorry for myself..
I am feeling sorry for the woman who sat around and allowed a lot of behaviors into my life that I knew weren't right for me. I am feeling sorry for the woman who sat around and allowed the medical industry who took advantage of my ignorance for so very long. But I am no…
IF it wasn’t dramatic, it DIDN’T happen..
IF it wasn't dramatic, it DIDN'T happen.. How many times have we heard that? How many times in our lives have we heard someone say that to us? Having our feeling minimized because it is not a simple answer or because it/was something that another person isn't has never experienced. So we get called dramatic…
Self Advocacy 💜
It doesn't matter what it is. Whether it is your sexuality. Your safety. Your health. Your relationships. Your love life. You have to be your biggest self advocate. No one is going to stand up for yourself better than you. Even if you have a living will and a medical power of attorney with specific…
I’ve been fighting my entire life..
July 7. July 7, 1993. That is the date I was supposed to be born. I was supposed to be born on July 7, 1993. But, instead I was born on April 25, 1993. At 0825 on a Sunday morning. I was in an incubator for 26 days post birth legitimately fighting to have a…
Teach them how to love YOU… ❣️
This is the hardest thing I think I've been dealing with for a very long time. I have been in EMDR therapy and it has changed my views on a lot of things. The biggest thing I'm currently learning is how to teach people how to love me the way I deserved to be loved.…
